Dont Drink With This Man

Ok, Craig might have mentioned me to you: I’m that Kelly-chick from the States (Pennsylvania to be exact). I’ve been hired as... well... a co-writer, I guess?
But word of warning, 90% of my blogs are written while I’m under the influence...
(See “Harry Potter and President Bush”)

Either way, I figured I should take this opportunity to introduce myself.
So here it is: *clears throat* Hello people of the internet!

(Cheers)

So there is this one guy (Eryn) who keeps showing up at parties I’m at, sort of a friend of a friend... And it never fails... Every party... He will lie down and throw up in the street.

Now, It comes as a surprise to me each time, because he seems like a strong drinker, (Mind you he’s like 167 pounds, and about 5'6.) He seems fine, putting away beers all night, but around one in the morning, he’ll trudge out to the street, crouch down, and a few minutes later he’s in the fetal position... puking.

The first time it happened, I was extremely intoxicated, so I stood over him yelling: "Learn to hold your alcohol!”

I mean, even thinking about it sober....
Who lays down to throw up?
Seriously?

Fetal Position...

With his hand on his stomach

It’s rather sad to watch....
But ever party... at some point during the night... you will hear the words “Hey! Eryn threw up!”

Alas, When I confront him about it:

“Kelly” (9:09:28 PM): Maybe stay off the alcohol tonight...
"Eryn" (9:09:22 PM): Maybe u should learn to drink
“Kelly” (9:09:28 PM): Maybe you should
"Eryn" (9:09:29 PM): I can!
"Eryn" (9:33:01 PM): It doesn’t make everyone sick...just a lot of people...

The Best Picture of Eryn I could find...
(Picture edited by Craig)

Now picture him laying down
And puking up
While giving the thumbs up
"Hey look Eryn is in the fetal position again, hey dude you ok?"
Eryn *does thumbs up*
Then vomits...

So, here are some new words to add into your vocabulary:

“Eryn” for Puke
- “Hey, I think I’m done for the night... I just pulled an Eryn..”

“Holy Eryn” for Laying Down to Puke
- “You have to see this! Amy is about to do a Holy Eryn!”

And, if you ever have the chance to be graced by his presence:
“Original Holy Eryn” for when Eryn, himself, is the one doing the laying down and puking
- “I never thought I’d see it, but I witnessed an Original Holy Eryn, and I have the stains on my shoes to prove it!”

Alright, that’s all I have for tonight... until next time!